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Do not fear fear itself.

Pain is a protector.

Fear is a guard dog for your needs.

All feelings are imperfect signals about met/unmet needs.

Our fundamental human needs are: physical needs, social needs, “becoming a better person” needs.

Healthy people don’t “cope” with emotions, they collaborate with them. They use “negative” emotions as clues, constructive criticism to improve their lives.

If your fear guard-dog is too hyperactive, don’t shoot the dog! Retrain it by forming habits.

Habit = When X, Then Y.

To form habits, have a consistent “When” and simple “Then”. Track your progress for ~66 days. One habit at a time.

Physical health affects mental health & vice versa. Hardware affects software, software affects hardware.

9 Mental Health Habits for your software & hardware: Meditation, Journaling, Sleep, Exercise, Eat, Talk with friends, Make new friends, Learning, Practicing virtues.

How to help to an anxious person ?

—Don’t deliver an ultimatum. This can lead to a power struggle and increase his resistance to treatment. Instead, highlight ways his quality of life could improve with treatment.

—Convey your own distress about his suffering—how you are worrying about him.

—anger could be masked anxiety

—Be compassionate. Don’t view him as being stubborn, see him as a human being who is struggling with a heavy burden of expectations.

—Avoid diagnostic labels. Using the word “anxiety” could make him uncomfortable.

January 1, 2020